I thought as I lowered my head.
memories that have come to mind. emotions that follow. Old names that I didn’t think were special and weren’t even worth remembering.
things you thought were special.
Goddess of War.
The name ‘Arya’ was given directly from ‘him’.
“… … .”
In the hundreds of years Noir has lived, it has never been as chaotic as it is now. For Noir, the things that determine his own judgment and actions had to be entirely his own. So far, Noir has lived like that.
Joy, anger, sadness, all emotions of that kind. Everything, such as judgments, worries, and choices, was entirely determined by Noir’s own will.
The same goes for killing Hamel.
She agonized over complex and true feelings, weighed her desires, her affection and obsession with Hamel, his primordial murderous intent, the sense of loss and regret he would have for a long time to come, sorrow, regret, and conversely, Noir himself died. The fidelity and satisfaction you will have when you… … .
That, everything was chosen by Noir. It wasn’t forced by anyone else.
Now, it seemed like it wasn’t. Noir now has too many impurities that do not belong to her. That alone was unpleasant for her, and she hated being influenced by her memories and emotions that didn’t belong to her.
So I didn’t want to tell you today. It was because I wasn’t sure if the actions I was going to take today were entirely ‘me’, Noir Jebella’s.
I thought I needed time. I just wanted to run away. If Gavid Lindman hadn’t attacked Eugene in the first place, Noir would have gone straight back to the estate without going down, or he would have locked himself in Jebella Face.
‘It’s already late.’
The moment I heard the name Arya, the memories and emotions came up too strongly. The actions that followed—- no matter how much I thought about it, it wasn’t like ‘me’. Noir is self-deprecating about that fact.
Even now, I felt regret. A kiss where lips only touch. stopped breathing. Neither of them closed their eyes. Clearly open eyes stare straight at each other.
It is different from imagination.
If I could kiss Hamel. Lightly, the passionate kiss of the night coveting each other’s bodies was also greedy—- no matter how much I imagined it, it seemed that I would never lie in bed with ‘that’ Hamel.
So I imagined another kiss. The moment when each other becomes the end of each other. Either Noir dies at the hands of Hamel, or Hamel dies at the hands of Noir. At that moment when you become covered in blood, your breath becomes thin, and your eyes darken.
put the ring on
share a whisper
– If you have one last wish, listen to it.
The lips that had touched slightly moved away. Noir laughed and kissed Eugene’s forehead. Eugene stared into Noir’s eyes without saying anything.
“What is different?”
“I’m not asking because I don’t know.”
“I thought maybe you recalled the memory right away.”
“Ahaha… … .”
I knew what you were talking about.
Ring on the ring finger.
Why did you suddenly think of the ring then? Why did he want to have a ring that was not decorated with fancy jewels but was more than ordinary and rugged? Why, at that time, in the streets where dawn broke, shed tears while watching Hamel.
Noir smiled lightly.
“I just got there, so I know for sure. I am… … not aria She doesn’t want to be Aria. I am just Noir Jebela.”
“… … .”
“I think you are too. because.”
Noir’s hands once again caressed Eugene’s cheeks. The fingers that had been groping on his cheeks went up to Eugene’s lips.
“’His’ lips were even rougher. It smelled of blood… … love… … there was.”
“I guess so.”
Eugene’s lips twisted.
“Because ‘he’ is Agaroth. Just as you are not Arya, I am not Agaroth.”
“But I have Arya’s memories and emotions.”
“So do i.”
Noir whispered. Yujin’s face was reflected in her big eyes.
“Do those memories and feelings that are not ours make us different?”
Eugene denied it in a low voice.
“If I am me, if you are you. we don’t change It shouldn’t change.”
Noir laughed lightly.
“That’s a great answer.”
It was the same with Noir. Even if memories and emotions that do not belong to her become anguish, she will not be consumed by delusion. Because, she is stronger than Aria, the witch of twilight and the saintess of the war god—- the queen of dream magic, the duke of Helmud, the lord of Dree Moor and Jebella City, Noir Jebella’s ego is stronger.
Confirmed with a kiss. It was different from what I imagined. I knew he was different.
“My wish is still the same.”
Noir’s face slowly moved away.
“Remember what we said at the bar then? I still… … Guilt, loss, regret, I want to go through those kinds of feelings. I want someone to die hating me. I hope you do too. I do not hate you, but I want you to hate and love me.”
this is right
Noir grabbed the necklace ring and said.
“My love for you must end with the death of one of us.”
this is right
Noir thought again. I suppressed the shaking that spread in my heart. He will not be devoured by delusion. But is the ‘shaking’ unavoidable?
His face turned away, but Noir did not raise himself. She still sat on top of Eugene and smiled sadly.
“But I hate this.”
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“What do you hate?”
“When I killed you, I wanted to hesitate. After hesitating and hesitating, I wanted to kill you, regret it for the rest of my life, and grieve at the loss. I wanted you to do the same for me too. Kill me after hesitation… … I wanted you to remember my existence forever.”
“… … .”
“but. Now you can’t do that. Are the feelings of regret and loss that I feel after killing you completely my own? What do you think? Will I, as Noir Jebela, regret it? Or will I regret it as an aria?”
“You don’t have to worry about that.”
My body doesn’t move well. However, Eugene forced himself to stand up.
“Because you won’t kill me. it is you who dies So, your troubles are of no use to anyone.”
“Ahaha… … .”
Noir shook his head and smiled.
“Then how are you? Whose feelings do you feel when you kill me?”
“It’s an obvious answer.”
“It doesn’t matter that my distant past was Agaroth. I’m going to kill you, and that’s it. How do you feel after killing you? Let me think about it then.”
“Are you running away?”
“I don’t want to suffer from an illusion.”
Eugene glared at Noir.
“So wake up from your dream too.”
Noir stared at Eugene’s face without answering. Eugene received that gaze and continued to speak.
“I am just me. you are just you past life memories? emotion? I’m sorry, but now is more important to me than anything else. Now, I am more important.”
He swallowed his breath at the end of his exhaled words. Eugene stared straight into Noir’s face and spat out.
“… … I remember. A promise that allowed me to ask three questions.”
“Let me ask you one last question. Noir Jebela. What do you want to do with me?”
I asked the question twice at Jebela Park and got the answer. It was the last question he had been saving for later, but Eugene decided to use it now.
Because I thought I had to do it right now.
“You are cruel.”
“And, he’s so kind.”
“You could have taken advantage of my weakness now.”
Noir chuckled and shook his head.
“You are right, Hamel. I, the queen of dreams… … Huhu, I never thought I would get lost in a dream like this.”
position was reversed. When we spend the night walking together in Jebela Park. Noir noticed that Hamel was ‘swaying’.
Hamel at that time was strange. She wasn’t pretending or acting like nothing was wrong. From the time he met in Bella Park, Hamel had been agitated. She still vividly remembers that moment.
Together, they boarded the Jebella Face and flew through the sky. I enjoyed the night streets of the lively and beautiful city. Noir at the time thought that the reason why Hamel was shaking was because of the gap with the ‘past’.
The gap between Noir Jebella 300 years ago and Noir Jebella now.
I thought that shaking was lovely. I don’t know what I’m seeing and what I’m mistaken for, and I’m suffering myself, but that shaking… … I thought that the feelings I had for Hamel would add sweetness to each other’s end, which would be beautifully decorated.
“What gives me sadness and despair.”
The gap in the past wasn’t entirely wrong. However, the gap that Hamel felt was just a very distant past life.
“Because my love for you has been mixed with someone else’s love.”
Noir’s hand moved. Instead of stroking Eugene’s face, she gently wrapped her arms around his shoulder. Like that, Noir hugged Eugene in her sitting position.
“Thank you, Hamel.”
Noir’s lips approached Eugene’s ear. A soft voice, a sweet breath, Noir Jebella’s voice licked Eugene’s ear.
“Thanks to you for saying that, I… … I think I can enjoy the past that is not me.”
-Is there any other way than to become enemies?
Now I could understand why Hamel had said that at that time.
“I answer the question.”
At that time, Hamel said while looking at ‘Noir Jebela’, not the witch of twilight that made him feel shaken. Just as Noir confirmed each other’s existence and her feelings through her kiss, she also needed ‘confirmation’ from Hamel.
At that time, Noir answered without wavering. that, as an answer. Hamel made up his mind. In these questions and answers, Noir has already answered with his own will.
“I want to kill you.”
The position was reversed, but it is still the same.
“That I was the Twilight Witch, Arya, and the Saint of the War God.”
thin laugh. Noir hugged Eugene a little stronger.
“That you were the war god, that you were Agaroth, and that you were Hamel.”
The more he speaks, the more his existence seems to be determined. It seems that each word is weighted, making the ego heavy and hard.
“When we realize that fact, we suffer from things we didn’t want to know, we confuse each other and our own existence, and we feel love and hate while being shaken by memories and emotions that are not mine… … Even so, they do not reap their murderous intentions, do their best to destroy each other, and then hesitate again at the very end.”
I lifted the head that was on my shoulder. Noir changed his posture to stare directly at Eugene.
“All of that would be deadly and sweet, like deadly poison. I can be sure, Hamel. if i kill you The feelings of regret, loss, and grief that I had imagined earlier would all be clumsy. maybe, maybe I might be broken to the point of never being able to get up again.”
“… … .”
Eugene didn’t answer. In the ‘end’ that Noir said, what kind of emotions she is really feeling. Because she couldn’t be sure.
Noir stared at Eugene’s silence. Calmly sunken expression and eyes. However, I stared at the shaking behind it. In the end, Noir laughed again.
Noir’s smile deepened as he raised himself. She was different from the beginning when she came slowly. Noir suddenly twisted his neck around Eugene’s neck, and then suddenly kissed him on the lips. The crushed lips and the rough squeezed tongue intertwined with Eugene’s.
The kissing moment was brief. However, a few seconds of Noir were enough to completely devastate Eugene. Far from sweetness, romance, or freshness, fierce and beastly. before the lips fall. Noir’s teeth lightly bit Eugene’s lips.
“I will make it. I’m much more attractive than the old ‘bitch’ in your memory.”
“… … this… … crazy… … .”
Blood flowed from his lightly bitten lips. Noir stretched out his tongue to lick the blood, then mashed Eugene’s lips once more. Resistance was impossible. A blood-soaked tongue ran wild in his mouth. He bit his entangled tongue several times, but it was a meaningless resistance. The taste of blood spread in my mouth.
seconds again. Saliva mixed with blood formed a thread between Eugene and Noir’s lips.
“It’s different from her clumsy kiss.”
Noir opened her wet lips and smiled widely. Before Eugene could pour out her swear words, Noir fully stood up. ㅡHwaaaak! Her spread wings folded. Light penetrated the darkness where only the two of them existed.
“I still hate dawn.”
I hate waking up in the morning.
The words I heard at the dawn of Jebela Park. Noir says the same thing as then, parting her bloody lips in a smile.
“I think I don’t even like twilight anymore.”
I have a new desire.
“I like nights where I can dream forever.”
Noir turned around with a horse like the ‘Queen of Dreams’.
“Then, hello, Hamel.”
Unlike the dawn at that time, the tears did not flow.